Finding what really matters.

Feeling stressed, Anxious, Nervous and Upset? When it gets to the time where you start to question whether anything is worth it anymore?

I mean WHY? Why should you have to go through all of this? Why is it right for you to feel like you cant do something or be yourself?

How is it fair for you to feel trapped inside yourself? The TRUTH is, it's not fair. It's not fair at all and its not right. You are as important as everyone else! Don't question yourself!

Whether it's a person or the thing you're doing that's making you uncomfortable and uneasy, you need to start asking yourself, Is it really worth it?

You shouldn't be feeling this way and you need to start asking yourself do I really need to do this? Do I need to put myself through this all the time?

It's hard to make big decisions on whether to stop something or not but sometimes you have to.

My passion is dancing, I love it and I've done it from a very early age. I love it with all my heart and I love choreographing so it was only natural for me to do a dance course at college. Luckily I had the privilege of being able to go to college to do performing arts while I was at school. We did a day release and went there. At first I was so excited and just a little nervous but I couldn't wait. But on the first day of going I had to catch a bus there. I got onto the bus I felt sick and I was okay for the first few minutes then I went lightheaded and I knew I was going to be sick so I had to get off but the driver wasn't stopping so I started to have a panic attack luckily I was with a girl I knew from school. She got off the bus with me and stayed with me while I was being sick outside. She then called my mum who picked me up from work and then took me there myself. Even though I was so scared and worried I still wanted to go so once mum got me there I sat with a girl I knew when I was younger and we then got on the shuttlebus together and when I got off that bus and was at the college I was sick once again. I didn't let it stop me though I still went because I knew if I stopped and went home I would be the exact same the next time. So I stuck it out and was hoping the next week would be easier. Turns out it wasn't. I was still sick in the morning and ended up passing out aswell. This carried on and I was passing out and having fits and ugh it was awful. But I didn't let it stop me because as soon as I got there I was fine. A little tired from the passing out but I was okay and I could cope. 

Then I left school. I passed my course I got an 'A*' so I was over the moon. 

Once I left school I decided to go back to the same college and do Dance Level 3.
I figured that I knew the staff there I knew people that were on the course and I knew the building so it'd be easier for me.

I was wrong. Sooooo wrong. Infact I got worse. I was passing out and having fits every day I had college which was 4/5 days. so it was mega hard for me. I was constantly feeling drained and tired because I wasn't sleeping. All of my energy was wiped when I passed out. I was always in pain because I was so tired and sometimes I really hurt myself when I passed out. It started to get to the point where I thought about killing myself. I got so depressed and I even got too scared to leave my house. I felt like I wasn't worth anything and I felt bad because every time I passed out it upset my mum. I didn't want that. I didn't want to see my mum holding the tears back or pretending that she's not crying. She was being so strong and I couldn't cope with knowing I was upsetting her and it wasn't fair putting her through all that. So when it came down to it. I thought I was a massive burden and I thought the best way to sort things out was to end my life. Luckily my best friend talked me out of it and I'm eternally grateful to him. So from that point I realised that college wasn't worth this. It's not worth me wanting to end my life and crying every night and day. So I told my mum I didn't want to go anymore she didn't understand why at first but I plucked up the courage and told her how I was really feeling and what was happening and she agreed it would be the best thing for me to do. 

Unfortunately not that long after all this happened my best friend that helped me through it passed away. It was extremely hard for me And before the funeral I was sick and I passed out. I kept saying I couldn't go because I didn't think I could face it. But after talking to a lovely kind person that knew Jeavon I knew I'd regret it so much not going. I knew I owed it to him to go to his funeral and I knew that it really mattered so I went and even though I was shaking alot and felt sick I knew it was the right thing to do and I was right.

Some things in life matter and others not so much. 

If something makes you feel so down and stressed ask yourself is it worth it?






Also I'd like to apologise for no post last week I had a dance show and I was gone from 2-11:30

And I couldn't do one before I left as I had been sick from nerves and I had to get ready. Sorry!:( 

When Stress takes over your life.

Stress can be horrific, we all know that. Whether we have a lot of stress or just a little bit of stress it can make our bodies do strange things. But when our bodies react to stress it can only stress us out more. Not good.

Some of the side effects of stress can be:

Thoughts-

-Memory trouble.

-Seeing the negative side of things.

-Constant worrying.

-Anxious Thoughts.

-Thoughts racing through your mind.

-Not being able to concentrate.

Emotional Symptoms-

-Feeling Overwhelmed.

-Moodiness.

-Short Temper.

-Not being able to relax.

-Unhappiness.

-Feeling lonely.

-Feeling scared.

Physical Side Effects-

-Nausea.

-Dizziness.

-Aches and Pains.

-Constipation.

-Diarrhea.

-Chest Pains.

-Rapid Heartbeat.

-Sweating.

Behavioral Effects-

-Sleeping too much.

-Sleeping not enough.

-Eating too much.

-Loss of appetite.

-Procrastinating. 

-Nervous Habits : Nail biting, Biting the inside of your lips, Pacing, Itching, Not being able to sit still.

There are many more different effects but these are some of the main few.

Stress can be terrible but how do we overcome it? That seems to be the bit we all struggle with. I mean some of the things that stress us out aren't really that big of a deal but getting rid of stress ends up being a big deal. I mean when you get these side effects but you don't notice its because of stress how horrible can it be? I'm sure you'll agree. It's horrible not knowing why you are feeling the way you are.

There are no quick ways to get rid of stress but there are things you can do to calm it.

Avoid. Now when I say  avoid it doesn't mean avoid anything that could give you a slight bit of stress. It means things that really aren't necessary in your life just say No to them. Just steer away from very stressful situations or even people that can make you stressed.

Alter. If there isn't any way to avoid something that makes you stressed simply try and change the situation. Try and deal with the problem or task head on and face your fears head on you may be surprised with the outcome. 

Adapt. If you can't change what is stressing you at all adapt to the situation. Change your mind set and think of the positive outcomes from what you are doing.

Accept. Accept that not everything can be changed. As much as we want to be able to change things we can't always. So we need to find a way of going through these things.

A few ways to calm yourself down can be.

Set aside some relaxation time. Exercise regularly. Eat a healthy diet. Get plenty of sleep.

Alot of these things are probably things you'd think to anyway on a day to day basis but these things all done correctly can ease you and make you physically healthier aswell as mentally.

Don't let stress dictate your life! You deserve better than that!

 

'Sometimes when people are under stress, they hate to think, and it's the time when they need to most thing' - William J. Clinton

Perfection does NOT exist.

There are so many views on what perfection is. But what really is it? Does it even exist?
In all honesty no it doesn't. We are all striving to be perfect but when we reach what we see as perfect we still don't feel good enough. You could be absolutely perfect to someone but you can't see it yourself because you are still striving to reach this picture that you see as perfection when really you already are to someone. 

Everyone has something that they would like to change about themselves that they see as an imperfection and it can be anything from they want to loose weight to their hair isn't how they'd like it and it can be more serious like they can't leave the house or they can't help but cut themselves when they feel low. No matter how serious it may be everyone has something they want to change about themselves and they don't see themselves as being perfect. 

Everyone has a weakness and everyone has a hint or perfection in them and we are all great people, we don't need to change things to be a 'perfect' person. Someone will like the flaws you see in yourself and you may even learn to love your flaws because its something that makes you different to everyone else.

We all have flaws because we need to show the world that we are all equal and human. We can't be 'perfect' and have everything go right for us because we aren't characters from films or out of books we are real. We have to take the bad and the good together. 

We need to learn to embrace ourselves and not keep fighting to get to something that you're never going to find. You can pick a fault in everything so instead why don't you find the best things and make sure you tell yourself about them.

There are things you can change about yourself if you really aren't happy but will you be any happier if you change them? Do whats best for you and only you, don't do things to please others! It will only be you that gets hurt in the process. 


'Gold cannot be pure, and people cannot be perfect.' - Chinese Proverb